Alright, it’s time for another politics update!
Please refer again to my standard formulation on politics: It is spiritual abuse to tell people they must vote for a particular candidate or political party under penalty of sin. Everyone has a responsibility to use their own conscience and common sense to vote for a candidate they believe is better for the common good. Disagreement is inevitable, but lying is still a sin.
This week, Chicago hosted the Democratic National Convention: four days of speeches, comedy, cheering, and surprisingly good music, during which the Democrats didn’t actually nominate Vice President Kamala Harris, since she had already been nominated in a virtual roll call a few days earlier. In addition to the usual politicians, the convention featured rap musicians, Kamala’s adorable little grandnieces, and an incredibly cool drum group. There were stirring, passionate speeches from Democrats like Barack and Michelle Obama, Republicans like Adam Kinzinger, and even independent Oprah Winfrey. Bill Clinton also gave a speech, and I took a nap. The Chicks sang the national anthem a capella in three parts. Morgan Freeman narrated a commercial. Keenan Thompson did a little comedy number to teach people about Project 2025. There was a hilarious internet hoax that Beyoncé would perform on the very last day, perhaps with Taylor Swift. So thousands of people who don’t even care about politics stayed up until midnight to watch the balloon drop, and all they got was a canned Beyoncé song. There was a DJ playing absolutely amazing music, which was very funny to watch because the delegates couldn’t dance. They were bouncing back and forth with their signs like ships at sea. There was something for pretty much everyone.
Meanwhile, the inexplicable JD Vance made a campaign stop at a Georgia doughnut shop, with none of the PR people apparently checking to see if the shop wanted him there, which they didn’t. It went about as well as you’d imagine. When the doughnut shop’s confused clerk asked not to be filmed, he pretended not to understand that there are different kinds of doughnuts and ordered her to fill a box with “anything that makes sense.” I can’t understand why the Trump campaign keeps sending a man who doesn’t like candy and can’t even pretend to like candy to places that sell candy. If they had any sense, they’d make more campaign appearances at farmers markets where Vance could buy celery. And to be clear: There’s nothing wrong with not liking candy. Everyone is different. But Vance is so mean when he says he doesn’t like candy. He seems to really despise people who like doughnuts and the like. Give me Pete Buttigeig munching on cinnamon rolls like Gollum any day.
But the most important issue I want to address tonight is the family of the OTHER vice presidential candidate, Tim Walz.
I’ve mentioned before that Walz is, to me, the epitome of a fun dad. He has two children, Hope and Gus; Gus is 17 and Hope is in her 20s. The children were apparently born after years of struggling with infertility and difficult fertility treatments (not in vitro fertilization, in case you’re wondering, but another procedure called intrauterine insemination, which doesn’t destroy embryos).
In his acceptance speech Wednesday night, Walz passionately declared his love for his children. Hope responded by making a heart gesture with her fingers and smiling sweetly. Gus was overcome with emotion; he stood up in tears, pointed at him and shouted, “That’s my dad!” And the crowd went wild.
The Republicans didn’t like it. I saw several famous Republican commentators mock the young man for crying out of love for his father. Ann Coulter called him “weird.” Others called him much worse names. Apparently the party of family values can’t stand it when people value their families too enthusiastically.
The backlash against her bullying was swift, but also strange in its own way. Some people simply blamed Republicans for being so appalled by a young man showing emotion. But many well-meaning people seemed to harp on the fact that Gus is neuroatypical. I don’t know if Gus is autistic or not, but many certainly chose to be. I know Tim Walz said his son has ADHD and a nonverbal learning disorder. I’m not a doctor and had never heard of nonverbal learning disorder before this week. But based on my very quick Google search, I learned that it has nothing to do with nonverbal autism, as others assumed. It’s a learning disability, like dyslexia or dysgraphia. A person with nonverbal learning disorder typically has an average or above-average IQ and can be very good at verbal communication and listening, but has great difficulty with nonverbal forms of learning, such as social skills and visuospatial organization. As far as I know, nonverbal learning disorder can occur together with autism, but it is not autism itself. It is just a learning disability.
As an autistic person myself, I found the way well-meaning people defended Gus quite uncomfortable.
I’ve heard a lot of whining about “disabilities” and “special needs” and other terms that disabled people often find off-putting. I’ve heard a lot of people say “person with autism” even though the majority of autistic people prefer to be referred to as “autistic people” (but you should ask the actual autistic person what they prefer when you talk to them because we’re not a monolith). I’ve seen a lot of patronizing and assumptions about his intelligence and his helplessness. I’ve seen misconceptions about mental disabilities. I’ve heard the R-word an alarming amount of times.
I want to make it very clear that there is nothing wrong with being neuroatypical or showing symptoms of neurodivergence in public. Neuroatypical people are wonderful people. Disabled people do not owe society normalcy. If Gus Walz were autistic, I would like him more for it. But I also want to stress that the reason you shouldn’t mock Gus for showing love for his father is not because he is autistic and we need to be lenient with poor, stupid autistic people. You should not mock Gus for showing emotion, because showing emotion is normal.
If you’re a well-adjusted teenager and your dad is giving a speech accepting a major award in front of thousands of live viewers and millions of TV viewers, it’s an exciting occasion. If in the middle of that speech he talks fervently about how much he loves you, it’s even more exciting. That’s enough to make anyone, neurotypical or not, burst into tears and stand up screaming. It’s also enough to make you make a heart gesture and smile sweetly, like Hope did. It might also make you laugh and applaud, or fold your hands as tears stream down your face, or energize you by swaying back and forth. Depending on your culture and the way you show your emotions, it might also make you look serious, and someone from another culture might accuse you of being unfeeling for looking serious. None of that is worthy of ridicule.
Emotions are normal. There is nothing wrong with having emotions or showing them in public. Leave Gus Walz alone. Eat a doughnut or some celery if you prefer.
And soon I will have another politics update!
Mary Pezzulo is the author of Meditations on the Way of the Cross, The worries andd Joys of MaryAnd Stumbling into Grace: How We Encounter God Through Small Works of Mercy.
