By Erika Kühl | Opinion Editor
Toto, I feel like we’re not in Waco anymore. We’re in Woodway.
That was my first thought when I entered The Butcher’s Cellar. Walls filled with instruments that could have belonged to my grandfather. Busts of animals that looked genuinely happy to be there. And the iconic photo of lunch on a skyscraper sets the mood for a meal that will catapult you to new heights.
The Butcher’s Cellar’s manager Matt Koen described the atmosphere of the place as “upscale quirky.” And he’s not wrong. With the fox-like curtain ties, deep blue plush seats and ornate wallpaper, you’ll feel like you’re falling down the rabbit hole of Alice in Wonderland.
My waitress complimented me first—always the right way to treat a journalist reviewing your food. She meticulously walked me through the menu, giving me a sense of professionalism that Chick-fil-A only wants to emulate.
Both chefs from The Butcher’s Cellar were contestants on season 21 of Hell’s Kitchen. Alejandro Najar and Alyssa Osinga created dishes that were closer to heaven than the show’s title.
At first glance at the menu, I can tell it’s not a Cheesecake Factory – in a good way. A menu of 34 dishes is more than manageable, but I prefer instructions from the staff. I asked Koen to bring me his favorites and he did not disappoint.
Shrimp toast
I won’t lie, I wouldn’t have ordered this myself. And not because I distrust the restaurant, but because I don’t like shrimp. Made with sourdough, trout roe, miso aioli and chives, they were a beautiful sight. Overcoming my fear of shellfish, I cut the deliciousness in half and took the first bite. I was confronted with the saltiness of the tobiko eggs, the subtle sweetness of the aioli and the crunch of the sourdough, which was a feeling I had never experienced before. For someone who doesn’t like shrimp, I ate two. And I packed up the others.
Bacon from the butcher’s cellar
Who can say no to bacon? I don’t think I’ve ever seen a piece of bacon this thick, but Oscar Mayer isn’t the standard either. Sourbon mustard glaze, pickled chiles, and apple mostarda gave the bacon a flavor I didn’t think was possible. The pickled chiles added a spice that wasn’t uncontrollable and was the star of the show for me. The sweetness of the apple mostarda balanced the spiciness. Every flavor was thought out. I packed that too. As a connoisseur of leftovers, it tastes great in an omelet.
Wagyu Bao Buns
I took two bites before I picked up my pen – that’s how you know it’s good. My problem with most bao buns is the bun to filling ratio. This one didn’t disappoint. Inside were marinated cucumbers, the same chilies as in the bacon, crispy shallots and miso aioli. What made it so balanced was the ratio of wagyu to bun to aioli. It wasn’t dry by any means and I wished it had been a four-part starter instead of two. I could have eaten the whole plate if I hadn’t brought a date.
Grilled oysters
Believe it or not, this was my first oyster. I know – not a good look for someone who supposedly has an exceptional palate. I applaud Koen for ordering things my timid mind was too afraid to try. Anxiously, with the small fork in hand, I picked up a dish I had been avoiding. I squeezed the lemon and inhaled. At first glance – delicious. I thought it tasted like Mexican food, which I can now attribute to the chorizo butter and chilies. It was a fusion of cuisines I didn’t know could meet in a delicate way.
Iron Table Wagyu Burger
“Don’t order a burger at a steakhouse,” say people I don’t agree with. Despite my better judgment from Anthony Bourdain, I pulled the trigger and pounced. Sharp cheddar, shallot jam, and special sauce are just enough ingredients to keep Bourdain from turning in his grave. The crispy edges of the bun had the same texture as a see-through French fry—and added a crunch that I know was caused by lots of delicious fat. Accompanying the burger was a selection of thick-cut French fries. I initially thought they were sprinkled with Parmesan cheese, but upon closer inspection, it turned out to be sea salt. Nothing to complain about here. In homage to English cuisine, Koen shared that vinegar and ketchup is the perfect way to eat these fries. This main course was unforgettable.
Lemon Blueberry Butter Cake
By this point, I was full. But like all good restaurant staff, they convinced me, against my better judgment, to order dessert. Butter cake is never a bad idea, especially with homemade whipped cream. This light and fluffy seasonal dish is worth the trip alone.
Brown Butter Chocolate Chip and Brownie Brookie
By this point, Koen had come to the table after each bite. The only downside to that was that he knew my taste. Even though I didn’t order the brookie, I was glad he insisted I try it. I could taste the espresso on the first bite of the brownie, which is always good. The brown butter cookie had white chocolate chips and a caramelized flavor like a good cookie should. On top was buttermilk ice cream rolled on a block of salt. My least favorite thing about desserts is when they make you feel so sick you need a glass of milk. This dessert was nothing like that. The saltiness of the ice cream and the richness of the cookies were the icing on a perfect meal.
Bathrooms are a big deal for us women. Men may not always understand this, but we appreciate a good hook for handbags and a place to put our phones. Both have been achieved in this relaxation room. Paired with gold hardware and eclectic animal wallpaper, it’s the perfect place to powder our noses.
My experience was nothing but class and good conversation. I would recommend The Butcher’s Cellar if your parents are coming to town or for a first date. As Koen said it best, steakhouses are not meant to be quiet, so enjoy good conversation and delicious food. And be sure to order a Diet Coke. They have a good vending machine.
