Breastfeeding is often hailed as the gold standard for infant nutrition, and numerous health organizations recommend it as the ideal method of feeding newborns. The benefits, such as providing essential nutrients, strengthening the immune system, promoting mother-child bonding, and supporting food security, are well documented. However, the enormous pressure placed on mothers to breastfeed can sometimes overshadow the fact that it may not be the best option for every family.
One of the main pressures is the widespread message that “breastfeeding is best.” While well-intentioned, this phrase can leave moms who are struggling with breastfeeding feeling like they’re not good enough. “The societal expectation that all moms should be able to breastfeed effortlessly is unrealistic and can lead to feelings of guilt and failure,” says Sarah Rieber, DNP APN-C IBCLC, women’s health nurse practitioner and lactation consultant at RWJBarnabas Health. “Not every mom has the same physical or emotional ability to breastfeed, and that’s totally OK.”
For many mothers, the physical challenges of breastfeeding can be daunting. These physical challenges are often the reason a mother chooses not to breastfeed. The CDC reports that while most infants receive some breast milk, most do not breastfeed exclusively or do not breastfeed for as long as recommended.
Problems such as low milk production, mastitis and nipple pain are common but often not discussed enough. These challenges can lead to mothers feeling disappointed and overwhelmed with themselves and their bodies every time they feed their babies. This feeling is far too widespread and underlines the need for a more nuanced discussion about infant nutrition.
Breastfeeding can also take up a lot of a mother’s time and energy. A Forbes writer did the math and estimated that a year of breastfeeding is equivalent to about 1,800 hours. That’s almost as many hours as a 40-hour work week.
The expectation of being solely responsible for feeding the child can be exhausting, especially for those who juggle multiple responsibilities, including work and other children. “As the math shows, breastfeeding is a full-time job in itself,” notes Sarah. “For working mothers or those with other demanding commitments, exclusive breastfeeding can be incredibly challenging and stressful.”
The emotional toll of breastfeeding should not be underestimated either. Postnatal depression and anxiety are exacerbated by the pressure to conform to breastfeeding ideals. Mental health is a crucial aspect of postnatal care and for some mothers, the pressure to breastfeed can have a negative impact on their psychological wellbeing. It is therefore important to consider alternatives that support both the mother, the baby and the family.
It is also important to recognize that some mothers simply choose not to breastfeed for personal reasons, and that decision deserves respect. Whether due to lifestyle preferences, health issues, or personal well-being, the decision not to breastfeed is valid. Respecting and supporting a mother’s decision, whatever it may be, is critical to her well-being and that of her baby.
Ultimately, the best feeding option is one that supports both mother and baby. Bottle feeding is a safe and viable alternative that ensures infants receive the necessary nutrients to grow and thrive. The health and happiness of mother and baby should always be the priority. There is no one-size-fits-all approach and it is important to give mothers the information and support they need to make the best decision for their family.
Although breastfeeding offers many benefits, it is not the best option for every mother. Recognising and respecting mothers’ different needs and circumstances can help reduce the pressures they face and encourage a more supportive and inclusive approach to infant feeding.
Want to learn more about breastfeeding? Visit https://www.rwjbh.org/treatment-care/breastfeeding/ for a quick Q&A session with frequently asked questions.
