According to a survey, Hong Kong parents are unable to control their children’s use of electronic devices, leading to hostile relationships, with nearly 30 percent of them resorting to insults and physical threats.

Social worker Wu Yan-yan, deputy head of the Integrated Addiction Prevention and Treatment Center of the Tung Wah Group of Hospitals, said on Thursday that the increasing use of gadgets has continued during the Covid-19 pandemic.

“If children’s use of electronic devices develops into Internet addiction, it not only affects them personally, but can also cause serious problems for the mental health of their family members and their relationships with their family,” Wu said.

The center surveyed 712 parents of students in grades one to six between September and December 2017. 28.5 percent of respondents said they had overreacted to their children’s use of electronic devices, for example with verbal insults, physical threats or inappropriate punishments.

Thirty-five percent of respondents said that their children’s use of electronic devices had led to increased conflict in the family, and half of respondents reported unsatisfactory mental health scores in the survey.

Just over half of the children spent up to two hours a day on their devices in their free time, 18 percent used them for at least four hours and 5.5 percent used them for six hours or longer.

The increased conflicts over device use were particularly severe among parents with children in fifth and sixth grade. More than half of the respondents with children in these two grades expressed doubts about whether they were competent parents in dealing with their children’s use of electronic devices.

Wu said families with children in the last two years of primary school are more prone to conflict on the issue because parents are more likely to be concerned about their students’ academic performance when applying to secondary schools.

However, the survey found that only 6.5 percent, or about 46 percent, of parents had sought help regarding their children’s device use.

“This shows that parents are not very aware of the need for help, or that they do not know how to help (their situation), or that they are worried about what might happen if they seek help,” Wu said.

Brenda Chung Yin-ting, senior director of youth and family services at the Tung Wah Group of Hospitals, said front-line staff had noticed that many parents were not in good mental health.

She said support groups have helped parents understand how to communicate with their children and set rules.

“They can take these skills (from support groups) home to discuss with their children how to use electronic devices in a respectful and open way. Sometimes this can set rules for the whole family to avoid Internet addiction,” Chung said.

A 45-year-old housewife who gave her name as Joyce said she was able to improve her relationship with her 12-year-old daughter after seeking help from a support group for three months.

Joyce said she decided to seek professional help after neither strict restrictions nor gentle reminders could convince her daughter to put her phone away, leading to a frosty relationship.

A turning point came when Joyce held a support group-style discussion at home, bringing her husband, daughter, and four-year-old son together so each could talk about their day and any unresolved feelings of dissatisfaction they had been experiencing.

“I think relationships in the family have improved. Everyone is more willing to discuss things with each other, rather than finding others annoying when they bring up their problems and not listening to them at all,” she said.

“I am also less nervous and trust my beliefs more.”