DEAR ABBY: I am a woman in my 40s who has recently become disabled. I use a wheelchair. Some days my body works, others it doesn’t. But if I walk a long distance, I get seizures. To anyone not close to me, I look pretty healthy, but I’m not.

About a year after I became disabled, my husband and I had to move in with my father so he could care for me. Dad does all the shopping and errands, and my husband works full time. I rarely leave the house. On days when I’m feeling really good, I go shopping with Dad. He’s over 70, but he has no problem pushing me in my wheelchair.

The problem is that I get dirty looks from other elderly people when they see an old man pushing a seemingly healthy young person. I don’t feel I need to explain why I use a wheelchair. However, it is starting to really annoy me that I get dirty looks the few times a month when I go out.

These people see me on my best days. I hope you can spread the message that some disabilities are invisible and that it’s OK to use a wheelchair when needed. – PUSHED AROUND IN IDAHO

DEAR PUSHED: Some people use handicapped parking spaces, and it’s not surprising that non-disabled people find this annoying. BUT, as you so clearly stated, not everyone’s disability is obvious. Some healthy-looking people have heart problems or balance issues (among other things), so it’s wrong to assume anything about someone you don’t know. If people give you dirty looks because your dad is helping you, just smile and ignore them.

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Dear Abby was written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.